Letting go of the behaviors, people or things that harm us can seem impossible. But why? Behaviors like trichotillomania can be in our past if we learn the fine art of letting go.

I remember seeing a TV show once which was all about life in a jungle. Among other things, the TV crew followed one local hunter and portrait the method he and other local residents use to trap monkeys.

The method is simple and very effective. The hunter places a barrel near the place monkeys reside and firmly attaches it to a tree. Then he puts some fruit in a barrel and seals the lid leaving one small opening just big enough for a monkey to reach with his hand inside the barrel, but not big enough for him to remove the food which is inside.

Then he hides and waits for the monkeys to show up. When monkeys arrive they smell the fruit and approach the trap. The bravest one reaches and grabs the food through a hole. In that moment the hunter runs towards the trapped monkey. Monkey can escape easily but the hole is too small for him to pull the food out.

In order to escape he has to let go of the fruit. For some reason monkey does not let go. He just tries to pull harder and the hunter catches him alive. The monkey is on his way to a ZOO because he just refused to let go.

That episode reminded me on how we also refuse to let go of the behaviors like trichotillomania or other compulsions, despite that fact that they do not enrich the quality of our lives. And the harder we try -  the results are worse and worse.

I remember the time I quit smoking. The main difference between the time I succeeded and all of those other times I failed, was the feeling of freedom of letting go of the behavior that was not good for me. Being free of trichotillomania is all about the art of letting go.

You too can be free of trichotillomania now. Find out how – read more! Now.

With love – Toni

Trichotillomania cure: success stories – video messages.

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When you want to make progress next year and find a trichotillomania treatment that works, this blog post may inspire you on your path to freedom.

But first on behalf of the whole team of treatment for trichotillomania – Getting Better I wish you and all your loved ones a wonderful Christmas and an inspiring 2013.

And even more importantly, a fantastic day for each day that will follow in your life. May you live each day as your last day and do what you really want and works well FOR YOU, independent of the good opinion of others.

Trichotillomania Treament and making the right choices!

An important question to ask yourself with regards to trichotillomania treatment is if the urge for pulling out hair is hapening outside of you or if it is the result of how you deal with things in your life.

In other words, if you belief that you contribute in one way or another to doing this behavior that seems to be out of your control. Think about this when you read the rest of this blogpost.

Because this was also one of the  wiser lessons from Abraham Maslow when he spoke about his pyramid of human needs and the road to self-actualization.

That learning to become independent of the good opinion of others not only leads to much more feelings of peace – contentment inside, but also helps to FULLY shine in the adventure of our life here on earth.

Not so much with what you consciously think of with your head, but more importantly how good it feels inside when you make the right choices and do the right things THAT WORK WELL FOR YOU.

And that your conscious – rational – thoughts are sometimes not the deciding factor compared to the unconscious part in you is something you undoubtedly already discovered in your process of overcoming the urge for pulling hair out.

That is why it is so important for all of us to learn to really listen to yourself and act upon what works well FOR YOU when we want to travel the path of self-actualization and freedom!

Something we all strive for according to Maslow!

A lesson I received myself and lovingly pass on to you when you are looking for trichotillomania treatment

Here is a lesson that will inspire you if you are looking for trichotillomania treatment when you learn to apply this into your own life better and better.

Not as THE SOLUTION to overcome this hair pulling disorder, but as inspiration and help for a step in the right direction.

Years ago when I travelled the world for 14 months non-stop with my wife I met a very inspiring man high in the mountains of Nepal. He had rented out his house in London 12 years ago and had been traveling and discovering the world ever since.

It was a desire he had carried with him for a very long time, and in order to bring that desire into reality he had learned to break through some limiting beliefs that kept him prison before.

Keeping him stuck in London. But then he defined a new reality and was able to start his journey.

Call it learning to see ‘reality’ with new – liberating eyes. With what is possible or not in certain situations or with what you should or should not do in order to be a good person.

One evening he told me about a poem that helped him every day when he had to make the right choices for himself, something he had become better at over the years.

Not so much on the basis of what was considered right by others or their expectations, but much more on what allowed for space in him to create the freedom he longed for in his life.

To inspire you for 2013 I enclose the original poem that the man in the mountains of Nepal referred to at the time. It was written by Robert Frost and you can download it here.

That is may inspire you too in finding your path to freedom next year and to discover that overcoming Trichotillomania stands for so much more in a positive way then only learning to stop pulling out your hair.

So that the energy and time that becomes available can support you to get the best out of yourself and live your life in freedom.

With love and wishing you well,

Rik

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When I still suffered from pulling out hair, I often considered this behavior to be the most insane problem a person can have.

Because how in Heaven´s name can someone constantly be at the mercy of the urge for pulling out hair and not being able to simply stop this behavior yourself?

As I now reflect on that episode of my life that I have finally left behind, I realize that what made a big difference in overcoming this is that I finally looked for professional treatment for trichotillomania after having struggled on my own for so many years.

And as I finally learned how to overcome the urge for pulling out my own hair, I also learned some valuable things in the process that really helped me to change my life for the better that I love to share with you if you still suffer from this form of behavior.

Getting professional trichotillomania treatment challenged me to consider what I actually wanted to do with my life!

After getting treatment for trichotillomania and overcoming the urge for pulling out hair I suddenly had a lot of extra time on my hands.

But also some unexpected things happened in my life around the same time: I lost my job – became unemployed, had to go back to my parents as a result and also had to deal with the breakup of a relationship I had been involved in.

Not the kind of things you long for to happen, let alone all at the same time. It kind of felt as if I was losing everything and there was nothing left to hold on to besides myself.

I certainly was not amused with what happened. However, I decided that it was also a good moment to reflect on the direction of my life as I had nothing to lose anyways.

So I started to explore my options, red several books, consulted several people and started to make new choices. Choices that made me feel good. But also choices in a new direction which I felt was right for me but I had ignored for quite some time for reasons that seemed to make sense at the time.

Actively being involved in my mission in life gave me tremendous joy. And the funny thing is that one of my new activities that came out as a result fits perfectly with this mission: to write on this web blog occasionally .

To inspire and encourage people who are still looking for help and might benefit too from professional treatment for trichotillomania as I did but just need a little encouragement to build up their trust.

Through the trichotillomania therapy I learned to open myself up and share my feelings with others more often

Before I received trichotillomania therapy I was always what you call a kind of ‘closed’ or insecure person.

And in all honesty, I also didn’t really know who I was as person, what I was capable of and what I wanted to do with my life.

Today with the help I received I have a much better view on my desires and capabilities that bring joy to me, which helps enormously in being open and honest about this. Both towards myself and others.

In the past I often felt ashamed and didn’t really like it when people informed about me and often found it difficult to share my personal feelings and thoughts with others. Even with family members and my closest friend.

But through what I leaned I now belief that the covering up of my head with a scarf as a result of trichotillomania in the past had a great deal to do with that as well. That the outside results from trichotillomania were actually the results of me hiding certain feelings and not being satisfied with the situation itself, which often caused feelings of tension and stress.

Today as I no longer need to wear a scarf around my head to cover up the results of pulling hair out, I realize that I have become a lot more open in sharing what I truly feel with others. And that doing so actually works wonders for me to feel much more calm and peaceful inside.

The most important lessons from the trichotillomania treatment I took home

As I went through the process of receiving professional trichotillomania treatment, there was one important lesson that really became clear to me: TAKING GOOD CARE OF MYSELF IS REALLY IMPORTANT.

That I am actually the most important person in my own life and that I deserve it to treat myself well and put myself first in situations where I had not done so in the past.

I also realize that as time goes on I am becoming better and better at this attitude to go through life, but also know that I need to keep reminding myself from time to time to prevent the urge for hair pulling to come back.

But also that what I have invested in myself through the trichotillomania therapy has given me so much I am grateful for. I see it as a way of learning to better love and appreciate myself through my new actions.

So every day I deliberately try to choose for happiness and personal growth with the options that are presented to me. Also, I no longer keep dwelling in a problem, because I have come to know that only the right ACTION will lead to better results.

I also feel confident about the future, because I know that as my life unfolds, I will always search for the right things to do FOR ME. That work well FOR ME, which give me peace instead of the tension or stress which I often used to experience in the past.

Because I realize now more than ever that the answers for any problem are already inside all of us, if we just learn to listen and trust our intuition – inner voice.

And that a little loving assistance from time to time can make a big difference if we feel trapped in a vicious circle that trichotillomania used to be for me. But in order to receive that help, you have to learn to speak up and ask for it.

With all my love and wishing you well on your journey for setting yourself free!

Stephanie

Trichotillomania cure: success stories – video messages.

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If you are interested in learning how to stop hair pulling when you suffer from trichotillomania, I am sharing a video below that I found on Youtube.

It’s a story of someone I don’t know personally who suffers from trichotillomania and explains how she does it, how the pattern of pulling out hair runs in her life.

One that I can use to probably make you hear and see some important information that can help you understand how we help people to overcome the urge for pulling out hair through trichotillomania therapy.

I am sure that when you suffer from trichotillomania yourself, you recognize a lot of things she says, but there are some important things I like to make explicit to help you better understand how to stop hair pulling if that is what you want.

Based on what I know of helping people in the process by referring to some previous blog posts on our website that suddenly might make a lot more sense when you (re)read them afterwards.

How you are pulling out your hair and how to stop hair pulling is all in the wording!

All of us at treatment for trichotillomania – Getting Better who are helping people how to stop hair pulling through trichotillomania therapy are trained in linguistics.

Because it is often in the wording where you can hear when trained for it that someone will often give away how they do what they do that they no longer want to do.

So watch and listen to the video below first, and then read my comments below and go over the additional blog posts mentioned to get a better understanding how this all works and makes sense.

Comments to help you better understand how to stop hair pulling

• ‘It gets my mind of things that stress me out. ’ I very much recognize this, because releasing build up tension inside is a pattern that often runs in the background if you suffer from Trichotillomania. Just (re)read this blog post on some advice how to deal with that in a better way for yourself.

• ‘Deep down inside I know that tomorrow will carry the same faith.’ Again, something I definitely recognize. Belief patterns can be very strong. And there is a big difference between believing you will pull tomorrow and believing you won’t pull. That is why we often work with changing limiting beliefs when we work with people to help them stop hair pulling. Just (re)read this blog post if you want to learn more about the power of beliefs.

Hope these comments and corresponding blog posts I refer to make even more sense now and inspire you that you too can overcome Trichotillomania if you truly want.

If you need help in that process, just contact any of us in the team of treatment for trichotillomania – Getting Better and we love to help you!

With love and wishing you well,

Rik

Trichotillomania cure: success stories – video messages.

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• Do you suffer from Trichotillomania?
• Want to stop compulsive hair pulling?
• How much better would you feel,
• When you stop pulling out hair?
• You can be cured of Trichotillomania!
  

Suffering from trichotillomania? You are not alone!

Trichotillomania (compulsive hair pulling) is a form of behavior that many people in this world suffer from and can be treated. Estimates vary between 1 and 5 % of the population suffer from this form of behavior.

In the neurology of the person the urge for pulling out hair has become an automatic – repetitive form of behavior that is triggered at certain times, often without the person consciously being aware of it.

You too can learn to overcome trichotillomania

Luckily there is a cure for trichotillomania! Through psychological techniques that allow the re-patterning of thoughts, attitudes, beliefs and behavior at the unconscious level where this behavior resides, people can learn to overcome compulsive hair pulling.

What are the time investments to cure trichotillomania?

Based on our experience of having supported many people with trichotillomania therapy we can give you a rough estimation that can serve as a guideline. Reality can always be different for you, take that into consideration.

Treatment for trichotillomania time investments – guideline:

• Average number of appointments (approximately half a day each) in our coaching practice: 1 – 3
• Doing exercises at home on your own with the follow up material that you will receive: 30 – 60 minutes per day for a duration of 2 weeks

Inspiration: read some of the success stories for Treatment of Trichotillomania to inspire yourself for a better life too!

“After a personal breakthrough session I can confirm that I have finally overcome this behavior, and more …. “

I recently read an article on Hindustantimes in India that mentioned how a young girl who suffers from Trichotillomania – hair picking was taken into a hospital as a result of eating her own hair for nearly four years.

Here is a remark from the doctors that operated her from this article:

“We have put her on behavior therapy where the heads of patients are covered to control their urge to pluck their hair. We also told the parents to encourage her whenever she manages to control her urges to pluck her hair.”

Putting her on behavior therapy is something that I think will work wonderful for this girl in order to help her overcome the urge when done well. However, in my experience, it is almost a mission impossible to encourage her or anyone who suffers from Trichotillomania with anything, because when the urge for pulling out hair is strong enough, you simply do it!

How to stop pulling out hair if will power and good intentions don´t work?

So how does one stop pulling out hair if will power and good intentions don´t work? The best advice I can give here consists of two steps. First you have to learn how to break through the urge so it no longer controls you. And secondly, which I believe is key to long term success, you have to learn how to prevent that urge to arise in the first place.

Why Trichotillomania: How does the urge for pulling out hair arise?

The under laying question when you are looking for treatment for trichotillomania is probably how does the urge for pulling out hair arise in the first place. Why do some people suffer from this and seem at the mercy of this and others not?

Let me answer this question through the answer of one of our clients when we asked her about the working of the behavior for her.

“When I am thinking too much I feel pressure in my head which makes me believe that my head is loaded with things I think about. All those things then pile up in my head and I feel it’s full in there and there is no way to get it out.

That pressure that builds up in my head makes me feel restless inside. I just feel that everything piles up and there is no space left anymore for anything else and at a certain stage when the pressure is high enough I will pull out my hair, I think in order to relax.

Kind of the same as if you would put in a needle to let the pressure go.”

Providing a cure for trichotillomania works on this principle

It’s my experience and that of my colleagues at treatment for trichotillomania – Getting Better, that this principle of tension that builds up which will make you pulling hair out at one time to release is the same for all the people we helped. However, the way this works can be different for everyone.

Because some of the people will not be aware of this pattern and can sometimes feel completely relaxed when they are pulling out hair. So to them, the relationship with tension at first does not seem to apply.

However, most often, it’s the same tension that has piled up and it’s just when they feel relaxed that unconsciously triggers them to pull out hair and release themselves of the tension build up before which still resides in their body somewhere.

Some people are not aware of this pattern at all, because they are in a kind of trance when they are pulling out their hair. To them, nothing seems to makes sense, because they are hardly aware of doing the behavior while they do it. Now in our experience, this group is a lot smaller, but we have certainly worked with people where this was the case.

In other instances, people build up tension in their bodies at complete different locations. For a lot of our clients it was around their chest, near their throat, but most of them only discovered this when we helped them in this process.

Is it really important to understand how this all works to stop pulling out hair?

I personally don’t think it is too important to understand this all if you want to stop pulling out hair. Because all the understanding about the reasons why and how the behavior works won’t do you any good if you have not learned how to change a behavioral pattern that is running like a vicious circle in the background of your mind.

You have to learn how to change those unconscious behavioral patterns and how to overcome the urge for pulling out hair itself. By equipping yourself with tools how to do this mentally and kind of automatically. But also how to make yourself a stronger person who expresses and lives up to what is important for you.

But also how to interact with people in a better way for yourself, so you stay calm and learn to steer your life in the direction that works good for you. Independent of the good intended opinions of others (with what is good for you) or your own rational / conscious mind.

Instead based on that part of the brain that is running a very great part of our daily life, our subconscious mind. More info on this can be found in this blog post on how quickly effective treatment for trichotillomania can be provided.

A first recommended step for overcoming your hair pull disorder that you can start working on right now!

Here is something you can start working on right now for overcoming your hair pull disorder that will take you in the right direction. And you don’t always have to understand this logically, but just learn to do it.

Most of us at some stage in our life discover that intuition is always right with hindsight when we listen to it. How does this work? You tell me. But I have made too many mistakes in my life by ignoring my intuition that I have learned my lesson well and will honor my ‘inner voice’.

Is this always easy? Of course not, especially at challenging times.  But I believe even the bible made notice of the fact that you have to learn to trust your heart and not your conscious mind when you want to connect to God.

I believe God resides in you and intuition is God talking to you. If you don’t believe in God, simply replace the word with love. It’s when you start listening to that loving part in you that knows what is best for you and only wants what is best for you, that you are on your way to freedom.

Free from trichotillomania and free from building up tension by honoring your true self. And rest assured that in that process you will have to change some of your existing rules of what you can or cannot do in life !

Because it´s not whether something is right or wrong, but if something works well for you. And when you currently build up tension somehow, some of your existing rules might need changing to change your life for the better.

What about this as part of a trichotillomania cure that works better and better as you try it on in your own life!

This means that you have to learn to make yourself truly important and learn to please yourself first. And no longer sometimes please others and ignore what you want and is good for you. Because that will build up tension.

And then you will discover that looking after you is actually a very social action of human kindness. Because all those that are dear to you will benefit when you come from inner strength and peace of mind. For example: a person that feels stressed will quickly yell at his / her child who does something ´wrong´, but a person that is like a Zen monk inside will simply laugh and ´correct´ the situation or simply ignore it as if it does not exist with a smile.

´Strong legs can carry a heavy load, but tensed up legs will collapse rather quickly´. Something to think about the next time you make a decision. Who should I please first?

And I do realize that most of us in society learn that thinking about yourself first is not very social. But I assume when you truly think about this you can find examples in your own life or those of others where this rule not always helps to create internal peace inside.

I trust that as you start looking after yourself first more and more, that in the end, all those who wish you well will support you, even if they may disagree with some of your new decisions at first. And when they need your help, you can now come from strength because you feel peaceful inside.

That is why looking after you first is a very social act! This is what Abraham Maslow already discovered when he studied self-actualized people. People who felt great and were doing great in life!

And as you discover how well this new rule works by applying it in your own daily life, those who might disagree with some of your new decisions at first will realize that at the end of the day, all they want for you is what any parent wants for his or her child: for you to be happy!

And for that we all have to travel our own path in life since we are all unique with our unique gifts and talents. It simply comes with the territory.

With love and wishing you well!

Rik

Trichotillomania cure: success stories – video messages.

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Below is a video message on the topic of trichotillomania treatment that I love to share for more reasons than one.

At first it will focus on the impact that trichotillomania has in your  life, like: how it affects you every day,  how you don’t want to do it and still do and how you often get angry and frustrated with yourself when you have done it.

I know that none of these things are probably new to you when you suffer from trichotillomania, but the reason I want to share it is the positive message at the end if you are looking for a trichotillomania cure.

Watch it first and then read my comments underneath that might help you further:

A recommendation when you seek help for trichotillomania treatment

So, did you hear that massage on the effectiveness on Cognitive Behavioral Therapy for trichotillomania treatment? That’s positive news right! That provides hope that there is a way out for you too.

That way of working is to a great extend what we focus on with our international team as well. However, a note of caution. At the end you will hear the remark to go to your General Practitioner (GP).

I do recommend you to do this, but also want to share some of the feedback I got over the years of people I provided treatment of trichotillomania too that can be of help in this process. Because some met Doctors unfortunately did not have a clue what the behavior was about and were even discussed with the fact that some people will even eat their hair too.

Such a response is probably human if the behavior is new to you and when you are surprised, but it certainly did not help the person involved very much and gave her a feeling that something was wrong with her.

But rest assured, you are completely normal and if you want to read more about that, please request and read the extensive ebook I wrote to support people like you to let you know that you are perfectly ok!

So just prepare yourself based on this info when you seek help and if possible prequalify your GP and ask if he or she has experience with treating or referring people who suffer from Trichotillomania.

With love and wishing you well,

Rik

Trichotillomania cure: success stories – video messages.

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When you suffer from trichotillomania and want to learn how to stop hair pulling quickly, here is a personal story that may inspire you on your path to freedom!

I have always considered myself to be a do-it-yourself handy man. I especially love woodworking. I like wood as a material and like to learn and try out new things. My DIY projects sometimes end up hidden away in a garage because they lack finishing necessary for public display.

However, some of my woodworking projects I can brag about when someone new visits my home and pays a compliment to a particular piece. Then I proudly say: “I did it myself!”

What I learned in life that can help you too in finding a trichotillomania cure and change your life for the better

Here is something I learned in my own life that can help you too in finding a trichotillomania cure. A way of thinking that I developed as I went to overcoming some limiting behavior myself in the past.

Through most of my youth I was a heavy smoker: I used to smoke 30+ cigarettes a day. Many times I tried to quit relying on my own willpower and firm decisions. My attempts were unsuccessful. My, so called, quitting would last a few days of agony and despair and it used to end by me smoking “…just this one cigarette”.

Of course – “just one” would become five a day, then ten a day, and soon after I would be my old self again, smoking a pack and a half. I remember that, during my feeble attempts to quit I was mostly just worried that people I told I was quitting would see me smoking. The fact that I smoked was not so important – the shame was only what I was concerned about.

When clients ask for trichotillomania treatment, I often recognize my own story

When clients now ask me for trichotillomania treatment, I often recognize my own story. Because in those days I didn’t consider smoking to be a major issue in my life.

I was a smoker and that was that! I knew I was damaging my health but it didn’t matter much. Not even when I ended up in a hospital with severe deep vain thrombosis.

My leg had swollen, I was in pain and I could not walk without a cane. It didn’t matter much… I continued with smoking even in hospital. Smoking was forbidden on hospital premises but I didn’t care for that.

I used to hide and smoke on the hall window. People would walk pass by this window looking at me smoking with my head outside the window just above a big sign “VASCULAR WARD”. Once this nurse saw me with a cigarette above the sign, laughed and commented: “I can see  how and why you ended up in here…”

What made me reconsider my behavior that might help you too in learning how to stop hair pulling

But then something happened that had an impact on me and might help you too in your process of learning how to stop hair pulling. Because although I eventually got well and was released from the hospital, I still persevered in my nasty habit for months after my hospitalization.

Until one day, my son, who was two at the time, had stated that, when he grows up, he will be “blowing smoke”, just like his daddy. That made me reconsider my behavior.

If I was irresponsible to myself – I did not want to set a bad example to my son. But how to quit? I had tried for so many times with my do-it yourself approach and ended up with no success whatsoever.

I decided to look for help. I found a coach who had experience with helping people with their addictions. She asked me some questions and guided me through a specific mental process she said will work for me.

When our session finished I went home and did the homework she had assigned to me. I also set a date for my last cigarette. I chose next Monday, and Monday came quickly… I still remember the peace of mind I had when I smoked that last cigarette.

Somehow I knew that that one would actually be my last one. I did not feel like I was losing something like I did so many times before. I was now a non-smoker and was perfectly OK with my new self.

What made all the difference for me and for many people who were pulling out hair that we were allowed to help

Now when you want to learn how to stop hair pulling and have struggled on your own, here is something you may want to consider. What made all the difference?

The process I went through and the image of a role model I wanted to be for my son. This time – I succeeded. And now, almost five years later, I am sure I will never light up another cigarette ever again. My coach made it easy for me.

In the meantime I have learned to help others and make it easy for people to get rid of different behaviors such as Trichotillomania.

It is so much easier when you have someone to guide you while you make your little life victories.

Which reminds me – I could get some help with my woodworking projects and finish the ones I got stuck with and which occupy my garage. Got to go and make a call…

With love – Toni

Trichotillomania cure: success stories – video messages.

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Here is an article from ‘The Conversation’ (an independent source of analysis, commentary and news from the university and research sector in Australia) that I came across recently that you might like to read yourself when you are looking for trichotillomania treatment.

It has some positive messages about the growing understanding and the effectiveness of cognitive therapy as treatment for trichotillomania.

What I definitely recognize in this article through my working in offering trichotillomania treatment to people over the years is the relationship between pulling and reducing unpleasant emotions.

This is how one of my clients defined it one day, and I quickly wrote it down because I could not have worded it myself any better:

“Tension is the most important factor that triggers the pulling of my hair. Negative feelings like grief, anger and disappointment often contribute to this. Also new situations often cause  stress and make me pull out my hair quicker. I need help to deal with anxiety and stress in a different way instead of pulling out my hair.”

So here is the article that I want to share that also gives notice to this effect:

Trichotillomania is a psychological disorder where individuals feel the urge to remove their bodily hair, to the point of obvious hair loss.

While the general community remains largely unaware of the condition, psychiatric cases date back to 1889, when the French physician Francois Hallopeau described a male patient who “manically” pulled out his scalp hair, resulting in bald patches.

This manic feature of the disorder refers to the individual impulsively pulling their hair in response to an irresistible urge or craving. They know that once they give in to an urge to pull they are likely to create further hair loss. But they still feel compelled to, in order to feel pleasure, gratification or relief. This leads to great shame, distress and embarrassment.

People with trichotillomania regret their self-inflicted hair loss, and devote energy and time into hiding the pulling and the hair loss from their family and the public. This very secrecy and lack of public awareness means that many individuals with trichotillomania believe they are the only person in the world with the problem.

Trichotillomania has a devastating impact on those affected. As one individual explained:

“Pulling out my eyelashes impacted on my whole life. It shaped the person I was and how I presented to the world, I was affected by it when I was pulling and it was present even in the moments I wasn’t pulling. That is, I got through the day with the knowledge that I would have relief by night, pulling my eyelashes out.”

Growing understanding:

Despite the profound impact trichotillomania can have on those afflicted, it was not formally recognised as a psychiatric disorder until its inclusion in the diagnostic handbook – the DSM – in 1987. Since this time, our knowledge has improved exponentially.

We now know how people “pull” – with hair typically removed from the scalp, eyebrows, and eyelashes, although hair anywhere on the body can be a target. We know that most people affected are women, with the problem arising during early childhood or adolescence. And we know that without help, the hair pulling tends to be chronic.

While initially believed to be rare, we now understand that 2% to 4% of the population experience the disorder, making it at least as common as schizophrenia – although the lengths that people go to hide their problem makes it much less visible.

We have and are developing treatments that work. Having traditionally been viewed as a simple habit, the “gold-standard” treatment for trichotillomania has for many decades been habit-reversal therapy (HRT). But with our expanding knowledge of the nature of trichotillomania, researchers have found that a blend of HRT with acceptance and commitment therapy – a form of cognitive therapy – is far more effective.

As with all mental illnesses, treatments still have scope for improvement.

Between 2% and 4% of the population suffer from trichotillomania. Chapendra

Classifying trichotillomania:

There are still great limits to our knowledge; more so than for common mental conditions. Given how common trichotillomania is, it’s under-researched, under-recognised, under-treated and misunderstood.

One current issue among researchers and clinicians is defining what “kind” of mental illness it is. Within the DSM disorders are placed into categories, such as mood disorders and eating disorders. These categories are important because they influence how we form ideas about the core features of problems, and influence both medical and psychological research into treatment. If a treatment “works” for one anxiety disorder, it is likely to be tried in some form for others.

But trichotillomania has had trouble finding a suitable “home”. Since its first listing, it has been categorised as an impulse-control disorder not elsewhere classified. Although its inclusion itself was important, this category – which contains everything from pathological gambling to pyromania – is a residual category with limited acceptance and validity.

Recently, studies have found that hair pulling also reduces unpleasant emotions such as anxiety. Indeed, our own ongoing research, interviewing individuals with trichotillomania about their experience and beliefs, highlights the role of both pleasure and relief from psychological pain that occurs when individuals pull.

In this sense, trichotillomania is similar to obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD), where people feel relief after they’ve washed their hands, following obsessive thoughts that they may have been contaminated. As such, the forthcoming DSM-5 proposes to reclassify trichotillomania as an OCD-related disorder.

While time will tell whether this change actually leads to improved treatment for trichotillomania, it should at least serve to better highlight the problem and encourage new avenues for research.

In the meantime, our research aims to improve the understanding of the problem and encourage individuals suffering in secrecy to seek and find help.

So that was the actile I wanted to share. Here as some closing thoughts:

What I also recognize in this article is that suffering from trichotillomania often leads to feelings of shame, distress and embarrassment. Although some of the people we were allowed to help easily shared their story with others, others had to overcome some hindering throughts before they could ask for help.

But one of the things I have learned to apply more and more in my own life, which has made a big difference, is that things can go so much quicker and be so much more fun when we simply ask someone for help who is specialized in a particular topic.

To give you a simple example: I recently wanted to add a twitter bird logo with the active number of followers to our Dutch website for treatment for trichotillomania that needed sepcial coding with what I wanted to achieve. And although I do have some technical knowledge and skills myself, I am definitely not a website building expert as compared to some of the people I know.

So after struggling on my own for an hour, building up stress and getting nowhere, I simply said: ´enough is enough´. Then I consulted an expert in my network and in no time she provided me with the code that I simply needed to paste into the website, and voila, there was the result I was after .

So asking someone for help who is specialized in a particular topic when you struggle on your own sometimes can take a little time, but once you do, can make all the difference in the results you get and how you go through life. That´s a principle that simply works, weather when getting treatment for trichotillomania or getting help with a website!

With love and wishing you well,

Rik

Trichotillomania cure: success stories – video messages.

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When you are interested to learn how to stop hair pulling, you may want to know that we get this question from many of our clients and it is a very worthwhile question.

We asked it ourselves when we first started working with clients many years ago.

Consider this…

The doorway to finding trichotillomania treatment is realizing that change is always possible

Change is always possible, especially when one has an open mind when wanting trichotillomania treament. Change is a natural process much like the changing of day into night; the changing of spring into summer and the changing of one year to the next. So change is a natural process and is everywhere around us.

Having an open mind to change is one of the secrets to quick, yet permanent change. No one can make us change—we have to be motivated to change and usually that motivation is most strong when we don’t feel good about what we are experiencing.

Many people get “stuck” in their hair pulling disorder and because they try so hard to overcome it themselves, they come to believe that they can’t change. Why?Because they have been trying to change themselves for years and it has not occurred yet, so they conclude (wrongly) that change is not possible for them. And to a degree they are right because it is true that they haven’t changed!

How to stop pulling your hair when nothing seems to work

But ­why haven’t they changed and discovered how to stop pulling hair?

Because most of us have a certain automatic “strategy” that we use– and even though we may want to change– our strategy just keeps producing the same old thing.

We have become stuck in a particular repetitious behavior pattern or strategy of pulling out hair, even though we wish we wouldn’t be!

Let’s look at cigarette smoking—it’s something that we can look at objectively because it’s not the main topic of our website– but it has a very, very similar pattern to other compulsive, repetitive habits or behaviors, of which trichotillomania is one. It is pretty easy for non-smokers to be objective about smoking as a behavior and it will help us to recognize patterns or strategies.

Have you ever noticed before that smoking really is a repetitive behavior? Have you seen people who smoke one cigarette after another? What about chain smoking? That’s repetitive to an extreme! What is the strategy that triggers chain smoking?

Take a moment and fully consider it. What “makes” the chain smoker chain smoke?

Finding out your internal strategy for pulling out hair versus understanding why trichotillomania exists

Your internal strategy for pulling out hair - the mental steps you take when doing the behavior (often without realizing it in the moment) - is very important to find a cure for trichotillomania in yourself by breaking the pattern and finding a better alternative that serves you better!

When we as mental coaches find out the internal strategy of a chain smoker – the mental steps that person takes when actively doing the compulsive behavior, guess what we find?

The act of putting out the cigarette by tamping it out in the ashtray is actually the new first step that makes the chain smoker light up the next cigarette!

Think about that again because it’s different for non-chain smokers, they aren’t compelled to light up because they see their cigarette being put out, but the chain smoker is unconsciously triggered to smoke the next cigarette as soon as they smash the last one into the ashtray!

So it would be very hard for them to stop smoking because putting out one cigarette is the trigger to light the next one! Literally a never ending cycle.

Also a repetitive behavior such as smoking has some positives otherwise people would not do it. Imagine all the advertising and commercials that we see advising us that “Smoking is hazardous to your health.”

Don’t smokers see these things? Wouldn’t it make sense that if they saw or heard that smoking was bad for them then they would just quit? Doesn’t that make sense?

“Yes, it does logically but logic is not the controlling factor for a compulsive repetitive behavior such as trichotillomania and providing a cure for it!”

The positive benefits of smoking must be greater than the risk for people to keep the pattern going. What does that mean?

I once had a client who told me that a cigarette was literally his best friend: they went everywhere with him; were available any time he wanted them; woke him up; calmed him down; cleared his mind; stimulated his creativity and provided peace and quiet away from his busy world.

In fact this probably wasn’t the whole list but I think you’re catching on. Smoking served a purpose—a very positive one and that is why unconsciously he would grab a cigarette to wake himself up or to calm himself down—literally whatever he needed the cigarette fulfilled!

What all repetitive forms of behavior like a hair pulling disorder have in common

All repetitive forms of behavior / hair pulling disorders have this in common: at one time in the person’s life they served a purpose—they were helpful in some way.

“In fact so helpful that they repeated them time and time again until the pattern of pulling out hair with Trichotillomania became so automatic that it just kept going on and on—almost taking on a life of its own.”

However, at some point the flip side of the pattern comes to the forefront—the downside such as health issues, self-esteem issues, relationship issues—so that the old pattern which used to be helpful now begins to cause more problems than it’s worth! Can you believe that?

So again logically we would think: Well then just stop it—isn’t that what you would do? Well now for many people it’s too late to just logically will themselves to stop it because it’s a pattern that has lasted 5, 8, 10 or 15 years and it’s now hard for them to break on their own.

And that’s where a mental coach who provides treatment for trichotillomania comes in

This is where a mental coach who helps with treatment of trichotillomania comes in.

We are trained to find out the internal strategy that the trichotillomania client is using—just like the chain smoker above—but each client has their own individual strategy that we need to decipher and then we can help them to discover new more functional and positive choices that lead them in a positive direction.

At the end of the day our work is successful when the client realizes that change is empowering and much easier than they thought. We help them to create a positive strategy that now becomes such a strong habit that it’s truly a permanent change.

Then you never know how far a change will go….

To your success on all levels,

Julie

Trichotillomania cure: success stories – video messages.

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